It was a blast. It went so fast. I’m still in LOVE with all of the decisions we made. I can’t wait to share more about our day. Side note – I haven’t bothered to add everything up but – we did keep close to budget. No more than 15K. So – no wedding debt for us. YAY!
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I am ‘pre-planning’ my wedding next year in July in Baltimore, MD and really need to stick to a budget of 12-15K. I’m planning to have NO MORE than 160 people. I have no idea where to start to create a fabulous wedding!! I’m trying to have my wedding and reception at the same place.Please help as to where to begin.
First of all, congratulations! If things in Baltimore are anything like they are here in Detroit, beware that Objects May Be More Expensive than they Appear. So I think it’s good that you’re starting early. If I were you, I would start by listing all the wedding things that will have a cost associated with them. That could include ceremony/reception site, catering, open bar and flowers for example. Of course there are more things, but these should definitely be considered. Rank your list based on what’s most important to you and your fiance. For us, for example, the decor wasn’t as important as the food. You know, different strokes for different folks.
Anyway, after you rank your list, call around and send emails to companies in your area to get ballpark figures for 160 people. You’d rather get a quote on the high end now and end up paying less down the road rather than the other way around. Keep in mind that sense your wedding won’t be until next year, if you don’t have a contract in place with a vendor, their rates could go up between now and then.
Hopefully that gives you a good place to start.
Good luck!
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So, of course you know by now (because you faithfully read every post), that we had our wedding reception at the Charles H. Wright Museum of African-American History.
What you may not have known is that there was another wedding within arms reach that night at the Detroit Science Center.
I kind of knew from the start that I didn’t want our wedding to be at a banquet hall. But in the interest of leaving no stone unturned, I did place inquiry calls to a few halls. I found after talking to several banquet halls that they could’ve easily been called “wedding factories”.
Brides and grooms were ushered in one end of the machine. A little “we always do it this way” and a lot of “we have standard procedures for that” later and Voila!, you’ve got yourself a complete wedding and reception in a box.
No thanks. I’m all set – and you should be too.
I mean, if you really put effort into finding an alternative venue, and you don’t find a place that suits you, then go with the banquet hall, because in the end, yes, you will be married. And that is what matters above all else.
But trust me on this one, it’ll be well worth your time and effort if you find a different locale.
Hosting your wedding reception at location other than a banquet hall creates a unique environment for your guests. It could be a place that reflects your personality as a couple, honors your culture, or is a nod to your alma mater.
Either way, finding a venue outside of a banquet hall will make your wedding unique and often give you more flexibility. It can be as casual or as formal as you’d like.
Consider one of these perhaps:
All I’m suggesting is that you not box yourself in when deciding where to hold your reception.
If I missed anything, feel free to add it in the comments.
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Now I know, if you’re ladies (and gents) after my own hearts, you went out and bought lots of holiday decorations 99% off on December 26th. If not, shame on you, you deserve to pay every penny of full price.
If you did happen to get some good deals, hopefully Christmas lights made an appearance in your shopping cart. Try using these little beauties as part of your wedding decorations.
Before you even fix your face to frown and call me tacky, just hear me out.
Now, in my defense, I’ve not seen this done tastefully in person, but I’m willing to guess it’s completely possible.
When done the right way, those tiny bursts of white light can probably do wonders at a wedding.
What do you think? Can it be done? Is it possible?
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I think I’m going to call these posts Detroit Love. Yeah, it’s pretty fitting. This one is all about all the very best things from our wedding. Believe me, there were a few things that went “wrong”, but in the grand scheme of things, they didn’t matter one bit.
When I think back to our wedding the best things, in no particular order, were:
I think sometimes people worry so much about certain details being so perfect that they forget to stop and take everything in. Or you know…Stop and smell the roses 
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If you missed the first 50, you can find them here:
101 Ways to Save on Your Wedding: 1-25
101 Ways to Save on Your Wedding: 26-50
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51. Search the internet for DIY videos done by other people. You can find them for everything from bouquet arrangements to cake baking. DIYnetwork.com is a good place to start
52. Grow your own flowers for your wedding. If you start early enough, and grow flowers native to your region, you should have plenty to use in bouquets or centerpieces
53. Use fruit as centerpieces. Apples, Oranges, Pears and Lemons have good color and are far less expensive than flowers. Plus, what your guests don’t take with them, you can donate to a local food bank
54. Search etsy.com for handmade goods that are unique and customizable. Some items are just as expensive as mass made goods, but if you do a little digging you can find some good values
55. Watch wedding related forums and message boards, especially those local to your area. People will often post about their good experiences with little-known vendors who offer a really good deal. Theknot.com and partypop.com are good places for this
56. Stay on top of your budget. Keep all your contracts in one place so you know exactly where they are if you need to refer to them. Question every line item to be sure it’s something you should be paying for
57. Keep a spreadsheet or use software to manage your budget. Know exactly how much you owe each vendor and exactly when that amount is due
58. Sew your own garter
59. Rather than pay someone you don’t know to officiate your wedding, ask someone close to you to become ordained. You can do so online without much trouble.
60. Instead of hiring a and or a dj, enlist the help of a friend and use your iPod to keep the crowd entertained. Create your playlists beforehand and have your friend keep an eye on it.
61. Plan your wedding yourself. Wedding planners are nice when you can afford them, but if you’re working with a tight budget, you can take on the role yourself.
62. Be willing to compromise on the food you serve your guests. Lunch is always cheaper than dinner and buffets are generally cheaper than plated meals. Work with your caterer to find the best balance between your ideal situation and your budget
63. Everyone wants whiter teeth for all the pictures they’ll be taking on their wedding day, but instead of splurging for zoom whitening, use a drugstore kit. It may take a little more effort, but the results should be comparable
64. Find non-bridesmaid dresses for your bridesmaids. Just because they’re not labeled as such, doesn’t mean they can’t be worn as bridesmaid dresses. Shop department store websites, where they’ll usually have a decent amount of stock and in many different colors. And chances are if it doesn’t have the bridesmaid dress label, your girls will be more likely to wear it again.
65. Ask only your closest friends to be your attendants. The more attendants you have, the more you’d spend should you choose to give them gifts.
66. If your ceremony or reception venue are already very ornate or make a statement by themselves, go light on the décor. Years from now, no one will hardly remember what your centerpieces looked like
67. Use address numbers from the hardware store for your table numbers
68. Use saveoncrafts.com for DIY supplies
69. Keep all your receipts for everything you buy. You may not use something and need to take it back. You’ll want to get back every penny you can for it.
70. Shop Black Friday sales the day after Thanksgiving in brick and mortar stores for deals on things like craft supplies, dresses and shoes.
71. Shop Cyber Monday the Monday after Thanksgiving online to find deals similar to those on Black Friday
72. Take advantage of free shipping for anything you order online, even if it means you have to wait a little longer for it. Patience is a virtue
73. If you have a vintage feel to your wedding, visit antique stores and flea markets to find deals on décor. As a bonus, you can use the pieces in your home after the wedding.
74. Use a site like bagborroworsteal.com to find jewelry and other accessories for your wedding day that you might not be able to afford otherwise.
75. Use a wholesale club like Sam’s Club or Costco to purchase flowers for your DIY bouquets and centerpieces
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If you missed the first 25, you can find them here:
101 Ways to Save on Your Wedding: 1-25
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26. Sew your own veil with tulle from the fabric store
27. Create your own hairpiece from silk flowers and feathers from the craft store
28. Send postcards as Save the Dates and save on postage and paper costs
29. Avoid letterpress printing for your invitations. Although it might be one of the nicest printing methods, it’s also one of the priciest.
30. Use construction paper as one element of your DIY invitations. It will add lots of texture, with only a little expense
31. Avoid hiring a calligrapher and use a computerized script font instead
32. Limit the number of pieces in your invitation suite and save on postage, since it’s based on weight
33. Use flowers that are locally grown and in-season and avoid the cost of flying them in during the off-season
34. Use a storage or organization box or basket for your card box that you can re-use in your home after the wedding for storage
35. Befriend someone in the event planning industry. They often have access to discounts to wholesalers and rental vendors
36. Do your own makeup, hair and/or nails
37. Have your hair, makeup and nails done at a cosmetology school like Aveda. The cost is lower and the results are usually just as good
38. Design your invitations yourself and have them printed by a company like gotprint.com. Once you get them, add a little interest yourself either with embossing or a similar technique
39. Serve cupcakes instead of cake. Cupcakes are often cheaper and can help you avoid a cake cutting fee that most caterers will charge
40. Depending on your décor, you may be able to find some things at a site like Oriental Trading Company. While most of the items aren’t necessarily for a wedding, you might find a diamond in the rough
41. Watch sites like craigslist.com and freecycle.org for free and inexpensive items that people are just looking to get rid of.
42. Repurpose mason jars as candleholders
43. Shop the brick and mortar outlet versions of your favorite stores like Crate and Barrel, Pier 1, and Pottery Barn
44. Get your wedding shoes from the clearance section. This is easiest to do when they’re off-season, but make sure you check the clearance area often as the selection often dwindles quickly
45. Support local business. They are often more flexible and willing to work with you to achieve your goals
46. Barter services. If you happen to be a talented computer progammer, offer to create or update a website for a vendor in return for their services
47. Let vendors know when you’re dissatisfied. They’re often willing to accommodate you and knockdown the cost, rather than risk a bad review or unhappy client
48. Look for your honeymoon travel on sites like priceline.com, cheapcaribbean.com, travelzoo.com, and farecast.com
49. Travel during the offseason for your honeymoon, even if it’s months after your wedding. Rates will be cheaper on airfare and your hotel
50. Dafont.com and 1001freefonts.com offer a range of free fonts that you can use for your invitations and any other paper projects
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Just in case you were wondering if the rumors were true, wonder no longer – 12k wedding is now listed on Alltop!
Of course we’re listed in the Weddings section with all the other fabulous blogs helping you navigate your wedding planning escapades.
Spread the word!
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Let me just say upfront that I can not take credit for this list. I found it at About.com and thought that it would be worth sharing. Not everyone will agree with every item, but you can probably take away at least one thing. So without further ado:
Wedding favors can be a thoughtful way of saying thank you to your guests. But far too often they’re a meaningless knickknack. Your guests don’t need a candy dish, or a little silver bell. Don’t think their cute place card holder doubles as a favor; what are they going to do with one place card? And do you really want a plastic Frisbee with your friends’ wedding date on it?
You’re going to spend a lot of money on things that will just collect dust, or end up in the trash. I think it’s far better to not give favors, or to make a donation to a charity. But cute favors include ones that are personal to the bride and groom. You might give food favors from the city you live in, or a box of your very favorite chocolates.
One of my favorite ideas is a breakfast bag. Send guests home with some beautiful muffins, a couple of good quality tea bags, and perhaps a little pot of jam or honey. The next morning they’ll be sure to enjoy your treat as they reminisce about everything that happened.
Money Saving Tip: Some of the most thoughtful wedding favors can be handmade. Put together a booklet of family recipes, or create a CD with an insert explaining why you chose each song.
It may be fun to have a pair of track pants that say “Bride” across your butt, but how long are you really going to wear them? You certainly don’t need to own multiple pieces of clothing that say “bride” or “groom” because they’ve got a limited shelf-life. And, you do have an identity beyond that of a bride. You don’t own a sweatshirt that trumpets your profession, do you? So why would you want people out in public to see you first and foremost as a bride?
Perhaps the biggest money waster of all is giving your bridal party “bridesmaid” and “groomsman” gear. Do you really think that groomsman is ever going to wear that tacky hat ever again? Do you think he’ll even enjoy wearing it the first time?
Money Saving Tip Buy a pair of pajama pants or underwear that says “bride” or “groom.” Rather than feeling embarrassed about wearing a bride sweatshirt out in public, clothing meant for the home will remind the two of you of your wedding day. Leave the other bridal swag at the store.
Some couples only invite 50 guests, but they still order a cake that serves 300. With cakes going for $2-$15 a slice, that extra size adds up quickly. While a large cake looks impressive, a small cake can be charming. If height is a priority, consider asking your baker to use a separator set, and adding fresh flowers between the layers. Or, use a large cake topper, such as this tiered floral centerpiece.
Money Saving Tip If you are having more than 100 guests, ask for a display cake that only feeds 100 people. Use inexpensive sheet cakes in the back to feed the extra guests. No one will know the difference!
Read More: Questions to Ask Your Wedding Cake Designer
The wedding industry loves to sell you goods by promising they will be keepsakes you can pass down to your children. Having mementos of your special day is a good thing, but you don’t need very many. Put together a wedding album, and perhaps preserve your wedding dress. But deeply consider every other item. Do you really need a personalized pen to sign the guest book? Is preserving your bouquet worth the money and the space in your home? You don’t need to have a wedding video, unless you will really watch it and enjoy it regularly. And not every toasting glass, picture frame, and photo album needs to be monogrammed with your wedding date.
Rather than filling up your house with tons of wedding mementos, leave room for creating new memories.
Money Saving Tip If an album is not included in your wedding photography package, consider doing it for yourself! That way, you can include the shots that are most important to you, as well as any mementos like your wedding program.
Read More: Capture those memories on film with a Wedding Photography Shot Checklist
Have you ever seen a wedding with more than a dozen attendants? It starts to look like a wedding army. Of course, if you are inviting lots of guests, it makes sense to have a large wedding party. But before you start adding your friend who you haven’t seen since high school, and all of your cousins, consider what the role of the wedding party should be.
Even if you’re not paying for the wedding party’s attire, each of those attendants requires a bouquet or boutonniere, a thank you gift, and an invitation to the rehearsal dinner and other parties. Tack on just a few unnecessary bridesmaids or groomsmen and you’re potentially talking about hundreds of dollars.
Money Saving Tip Give some of your friends and loved ones different roles in the wedding. Consider asking them to read during the ceremony or give them a special role at the reception. You might even just thank them in the program for helping to support you during the wedding planning process.
Read More: How Many Bridesmaids and Groomsmen Should You Have?
What’s missing from the list? What, in your opinion is a waste of money and could just be eliminated?
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I truly believe that many brides lose site of the end product/consequences of their wedding. I’ve seen one bride need counseling immediately following the wedding for this very thing. She lost site of how the wedding would change her life. The marriage that follows the one-day wedding is meant to last a lifetime.
In planning this wedding, I’ve found that there’s a lot of hype surrounding the wedding industry. And have you seen what average wedding budgets look like? The statistics are off the charts crazy.
Don’t get me wrong. I like a flower and dress as much as the next person, but in many cases, the wedding industry preys on a person’s hyped up emotions. Decisions that you wouldn’t think twice about pre-engagement are discovered and exploited by the industry and budgets end up blown.
And there will be certain things you don’t want to budge on. I get that. I don’t want to budge on finding a venue in downtown Detroit. Choose your battles and keep in mind that every time you insist on not budging, it’s probably gonna end up hitting you in the pocket.
Sure history and tradition will dictate some parts of your wedding, but history is made every day and traditions are created every day. It’s okay to be your own bride.
I don’t mean to come off as a Debbie Downer here, but I do mean to encourage everyone to think twice before insisting that your wedding has to be the biggest, most extravagant affair anyone has ever experienced.
Let me know if you agree, think I’m totally wrong, or if I’m somewhere in between. I’d like to hear what you think.
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Mrs. 12k - The newlywed with lots of wedding tips and ideas for the bride on a budget. 
DetroitGyrl - I'm on an 18 month crash course to plan the best "PARTY to KICK off a MARRIAGE" you've ever seen.
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